Your A&E visits......funny or serious

Discussion in 'CycleChat Cafe' started by Dave7, 10 Aug 2019.

  1. Dave7

    Dave7 Guru

    Location:
    Cheshire
    @Accy cyclist 's latest story got me thinking. (Accy, I do feel for you but you have a gift for injecting humour into it).
    I think my only visit followed an incident while playing golf.
    A guy playing the opposite way on the adjacent fairway sliced a shot which hit my collar bone then my jaw. I recall falling into a dark pit then, literally, waking up with a crowd around me.
    I ended up in A&E with concussion.
    Mrs D came to hospital by bus and later we walked/staggered home as we had no money.
     
    Accy cyclist and welsh dragon like this.
  2. classic33

    classic33 Legendary Member

    Reason for that visit to A&E the same as many over the years.
     
  3. Drago

    Drago Flouncing Nobber

    Location:
    Valhalla
    Well, I was hoovering naked when I fell down the stairs and landed on an aubergine...
     
    Edwardoka, colly, Profpointy and 9 others like this.
  4. OP
    OP
    Dave7

    Dave7 Guru

    Location:
    Cheshire
    Did they ever find it ?
     
    Edwardoka, C R, guitarpete247 and 4 others like this.
  5. midlife

    midlife Guru

    ..... Playing hunt the missing shower head
     
  6. OP
    OP
    Dave7

    Dave7 Guru

    Location:
    Cheshire
    I have to say Accy.....reading your stories is like reading about men using Veet hair renoval.......I am crying laughing.
     
    Accy cyclist likes this.
  7. Not heard it with an Aubergine, but...……. with the vacuum hose itself...… yes!
     
  8. classic33

    classic33 Legendary Member

    In A&E many years ago, we'd two at the time on the outskirts of town. A stabbing victim, knife still in, was brought in with a police escort/guard.

    Whilst they were working on the best means of removing it from him, he took the deciscion for them. Simply pulling the knife out and going after the nurse keeping an eye on him.

    Subsequent treatment when stopping him from running round with the knife wasn't as gentle. Brought to the floor by at least two police officers and a few porters.

    Only curtains between cubicles at the time.
     
    raleighnut likes this.
  9. Sarah's fairly diplomatic

    However, if it had been some of the other Consultants, or indeed Nursing staff...…………………….


    https://www.wakefieldexpress.co.uk/...hospital-a-e-with-broken-fingernail-1-9901334
     
  10. Been there, done that, not with a knife though, but had to restrain/deal with a few others
    Once got a broken nose for my troubles:laugh:
     
  11. Drago

    Drago Flouncing Nobber

    Location:
    Valhalla
    I heard a story once, don't know how true it is. I suspect likely not, but an eye watering tale.

    Late one night a guy comes in from ambo, naked, covered in blood, with his nadger hanging on by a thread of flesh.

    About half an hour later his girlfriend presents herself at A and E with some very nasty facial bruising.

    The story goes that she had been, erm, trying to inflate the autopilot, when she had some kind of fit and her teeth clamped down hard. Chappie was unsurprisingly a little surprised, and in not a little bit of pain, was desperately trying to get her off...
     
    Edwardoka, meta lon and raleighnut like this.
  12. gbb

    gbb Legendary Member

    Location:
    Peterborough
    A serious one with a funny twist (with hindsight)
    I was maybe 19 and on the way home posted myself on a tree support post I'd stood on to lift myself over a parapet. I was bleeding profusely through my willy :ohmy: when the ambulance arrived, the medic asked...
    'Did you hit your testicles ?'

    In my pain wracked state I didn't hear him properly ...he must have thought ...ffs..and asked again...
    'Did you hit your balls?"

    I came millimetres from smashing them...but smashed my prostate instead :whistle:.
     
  13. OP
    OP
    Dave7

    Dave7 Guru

    Location:
    Cheshire
    That story was true.
    They stitched it back and I married her ^_^
     
    Edwardoka, colly, Drago and 1 other person like this.
  14. gbb

    gbb Legendary Member

    Location:
    Peterborough
    Two involving others misfortunes..
    We were in A&E on separate occasions, a young fella arrived with his mum, he with a blood soaked tea towel clamped to his forehead. His mum explained hed been cutting the roof off a car and the grinder kicked, smashing the disc into his forehead creating a massive slice apparently. :whistle:

    Another time a young guy and his gf arrived, he with a towel clamped to his cheek, looking rather sheepish and pained. We overheard the nurse asking what happened..his gf replied...
    'HIS SNAKE BIT HIM :ohmy:'...then continued with an afterthought....
    'He only got it today :sad:'

    I guess that was a pet that wasnt going to be remembered well...
     
    raleighnut likes this.
  15. swee'pea99

    swee'pea99 Legendary Member

    Serious: when my wife brought me in after my prang with what later turned out to be a broken hip, one of their first questions was 'were you wearing a helmet?' When I answered no, I was immediately whisked through the crowded A&E and seen straight away. My guess being, they daren't take a chance of a life-threatening head injury. So, tip for the top: if you want to jump the queue, don't wear a helmet...or at least say you didn't.
     
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